Back to parenting 101.

As Luke and I discover what we feel we've been missing with Christianity in general, and learning to live IN Christ and in His glorious freedom, we are being challenged and stretched. We are learning that we've done a lot of things not according to how Christ would have dealt with things, and I don't simply mean W.W.J.D...I mean, I need to let the Christ IN me respond instead...my fleshly-ness will never be enough no matter how hard I try.

I know I've mentioned us reading "Loving Our Kids On Purpose"..it been a real eye opener and Luke and I are struggling through trying to make sense of the parenting style we've been practicing. One of strict obedience and punishment when said obedience isn't obtained. To be honest, I don't feel like our methods have been working. Sure, I may correct the issue for the moment, but we've learned once the authority is absent, the behavior continues which means, we have not accomplished anything other then showing our children "You do something we don't deem ok, and you will get punished for it.". Its really just about fear mongering our children into obedience instead of winning their hearts like the Father has won ours and knowing that in turn they will obey out of love..but even then, obedience shouldn't be the main goal of parenting, and to be honest that has always been how I've thought. Something I read really stood out yesterday when Luke and I read together..and its made me really think about how I'm approaching discipline.

Angry, fearful reactions to people's mistakes reveal that somewhere in our minds still lurks that fundamental belief of the Old Covenant, not only that people CAN be controlled but that they NEED to be controlled, and they need to be controlled through punishment. They need to experience the pain of our anger so that they won't make mistakes that cause us to feel out of control. We think: "I must control them so I can have some control over the quality of my own life."..

I am an admitted control freak. I hate feeling out of control or powerless, so this has been really hard to swallow.  But I know that letting go and letting Christ flow through me will be much more effective then the way I've been handling them.